When it comes to how we feel, nobody really asks many questions.
Before a human asks why they feel a certain way, an over the counter remedy is searched, recommended, or the dreaded simple explanation is extended:
“You just need some exercise. It takes away everything.”
As we all know, if it happens not to be something a couple jumping jacks a day can’t take care of, it will, come back.
Or never leave at all.
I would argue that the only time we really do ask “why”, is when one of those therapist humans are sitting across from us, having asked it for us.
Which, for some, could be never.
It is quite odd to me, I have to say, that we would not ask ourselves why the hell we feel like death, or alone, or anxious or depressed.
Namely, because my biological psychology book has been quite clear on the fact that humans, will always, behave a certain way, and for a certain reason.
So, when we are suffering, we cast this information aside and immediately attempt to acquire some sort of bandaid, for something that may need stitches.
Most of us do this.
No wonder, even almost ten years ago, mental disorders cost America over 190 billion to treat.
However, I am not wanting to shed light on why “the system” likes to see people sick, and why the people that should be helping only see mental illness as a monopoly.
I am, however, saying to the individual suffering, why?
Why do you feel the way you do?
Were is it coming from?
Did it begin last week, last year, or have you been carrying it with you since a child.
Biological disorders are another story, I suppose these are cases in which running to medication is feasible and even encouraged.
No matter, anti-depressants are like many other medication: most of them don’t heal anything.
(By all means, do what you have to do to stay alive.)
But we do things for a reason.
We feel things for a reason.
There is a reason we do what we do.
From drinking to speaking to running; to eating and partying; sleeping around like litter hamsters to giving our extra time and money to the poor: there is a reason for it all.
Asking why, in regards to our mental state, will almost always yield information.
No different than thirst.
We drink because our bodies need water for many, actually, all biological process in our bodies in which keep us alive. (Unless we are not really thirsty and just want to have a 300g sugar coffee from Starbucks.)
But what about feeling down.
What if, something that happened some years ago left our minds shattered, and webbed with illogical beliefs that, now, thwart most all of our attempts to be happy.
“I can’t have a new job, I’m stuck.”
“I lost all my friends.”
“I am not good enough.”
“I’m a failure.”
“Everyone thinks I am a loser.”
These phrases slip below the radar of our conscious minds (probably because we don’t want to think about the experience they were born from), meanwhile, all we are trying to do is find a pill or depend on a stranger fix us that, we never look to see what exactly we missed.
I never looked, and after some time of wearing bandaids, I almost died.
And now, I don’t want to die.
I’m learning how to feel good, despite what my world looks like.
It is the strangest thing, but, it began happening by addressing all of the things I had not been looking at.
Or, should I say, running from.
When we don’t, we enter into the realms of avoidance-coping.
It is, essentially, a way humans deal with their stress and as the name implies, it is rather straight forward idea: avoid it all.
Risky in any sense, I suppose it can be applicable for the things we cannot change.
However, for things mentioned above, it is, fundamentally speaking:
Then again, maybe that’s just it, we don’t even care enough about ourselves to try and find some sort of healing.
Which is another topic in itself, however, it fits: care about yourself.
Or, at-least learn to.
We are all we have.
Well, you may have your God and family, etc.
But it is in fact our brains, and, our lives, so, there has to be some level of responsibility for our own self-care or, we will wither.
Caring about yourself can be impossible for some but we have discussed a simple way of beginning to do this.
The next time your brain feels like shit; sad, angry, you name it:
ask why man!
Before we run to a unnatural “remedy”, ask why.
See where it leads.
It could be the beginning of a search that ends in weights being lifted off of our shoulders in real-time. (Like we just popped some anti-depressants.)
Then again, I suppose many do not care about feeling better but, they have plenty of bandaids to choose from.
Real healing, however, happens AFTER finding the wound, cleaning it, and then patching it up.
But we have to find them first.